old pal

every once in a while i will think about my old dog fred who died a few years ago and my heart will ache and my chest gets tight. i never got to make it up to him what a shitty friend i was. and i know in my heart of hearts that if there is an after life, i am sure to be punished for his lonliness. i was seventeen when i got him and we were inseperable. then i went away to college and basically sentenced him to a life in backyard prison. and everytime i went home to visit, he would beg me to play with him, or to take him out like i used to. god we went everywhere together, we went to the beach a lot. he was my best friend. but i would ignore him and became annoyed at his cries. then, a couple years later i got a little dog, papi, that i had with me all the time. in the house that he was not allowed in. i hate what i did and i am truly, deeply sorry. it is probably the worst thing i have done in my life.